4 Top Scoring Narratives
From the 2021 Selective School Test
Based on this image students were asked to write a narrative:
Here are 4 Scholarly student responses... enjoy!
‘Sand, sea, sky, loss, depression. A coast of despicable grains of hate and pity, each containing a lost friend, a lost item in a sea of pain and sorrow, spans further than the eye can see. The wave of time gently laps at the shore, washing the memory of forgotten souls far away. Away to foreign places, to the end of times where they remain till a time of forgiveness. But I wasn’t. As if a stray soul had jammed the gears of change. That soul was me. Exiled for my impulse, outlawed for decisions, I sit here, resigned to the stairs of beginnings, pondering my next venture. Should I quit, leave for a world of uncertainty, where hunger and starvation roam the streets, or should I stay, face my boss and be handed a few green notes and return the next day, barely alive pockets empty only to repeat till the end of time. I couldn’t think, only see a face, the face of my lost friend, my last friend.
Rough, Stygian black stairs descended me down in a bottomless abyss of agony and misery, vigorously thrashing me against the jagged, piercing rocks that lay adjacent to the sand of trust and benevolence. I catapulted razor-sharp pebbles towards the gleaming sand, rippling what was once my heart and soul.
Wincing in invisible pain, I clutched my heart as waves of tumultuous dejection crashed upon my weakening soul. I stared at the desolation of the alabaster white wall in hope to find restoration, but I knew our friendship was over as my eyes fixed to the patch of worn off paint, chipped off by waves of time.
Why have I been so mindless? Why have I been betrayed so ruthlessly? Why does the world have to be so cruel? A vortex of questions devoured me whole, submerging my mind under the battling tides.
‘Ferocious waves of anguish and despair lashed at the benumbed shores of my paralysed mind as I dug my feet into the constant-moving sand of truth and benignity. The sun set on the coast of our good will. I could see the rest of the world, drifting farther away as teardrops made up her pond. I gasped for breath as I drowned in the whirlpool of thoughts, the waves of reality tumbling on the pebbles of treachery, deceit and fraud. Minutes ago, my world had been a shimmering globule of pride, joy and abundance blissfully cruising on waves of camaraderie. Now it was a turbulent, colourless chronicle of agony and horror.
Why was I betrayed? Sounds of joyous chattering echoed like a waterfall on the banks of my ears. Carefree giggles had been the sails of our boat. Incessant swells of poignantly vivid memories of our companionship whipped the hidden depths of my mind, reminding me of the rich bronze castles of trust and faith that we built together over the last thirty years. One tide of greed had made it crumble. I extended my hands as if to protect the fort of bonding from being devoured by the overlapping turquoise ripples of the ocean, but it vanished into an obsidian black of nothingness.
I felt weak, flailing my arms.’