Week 2 Writing Homework
- October 27, 2024
- 3:30 pm
- 19 Comments
Write a story about Finn’s adventure as he tries to win this competition and save his parents’ struggling bike shop. starting with…
Finn’s heart raced as he pedalled through the narrow streets of Amsterdam. Suddenly, he screeched to a halt, his eyes fixed on a colourful poster announcing a citywide bicycle safety competition…
Please upload your homework as a comment below:
19 thoughts on “Week 2 Writing Homework”
Finn and his friends were pedaling home from a tiring day.
” Finn！Look” Luke yelled out suddenly，”There’s going to be a huge bicycle compitition in 3 months!”
” What! Really!” exclaimed Finn. He screched to halt excitedly and read out the word on the billboard.
” What？Designing a bike then riding that bike in a competition? ” uttered Finn, ” How are we going to do that with a bunch of junk? But if we win we get a thousand dollars and that will help my parent’s business!”
For the next few weeks they began saving pocket money and buying materials for the bike. They put oil on the chain every day and polished the bike. They painted the bike red as that was the colour of the logo of the buisness. A few pieces of battered metal they brought actually turned out to be a eco-friendly beautiful bike due to there inspiration. They started practicing for the big day. When the day finally came, Finn was balanced on his bike and ready to go.
” Competitors, the day has finally come for the big man to begin. On your marks, get set go! ” Finn was pedaling furiously to try win the race. He could see his mum and dad waving enthusiasticly at him. This gave him his hope. He was already in the lead but then bang! His bike hit a rock he was pelting to the ground at light speed and before fe knew it … Bang! He flung into a tree. Knees all bloody and elbow bleeding he rushed to his bike and started pedalling. The other people were losing energy and were huffing furiously. But he kept his stamina and slowly beat all of the competitors one by one. In the end his tiny bike was battered but he still won.
” Finn! Great job! You actually did it!” blurted out Luke.
” It’s nothing a person can achieve anything if he puts his heart into it. ” said Finn.
Later when Finn grew up he started a bike school. Every one far and wide came to his school. And he always said the same quote. ” A person can achieve anything if he puts his heart into it.”
FEEDBACK
Chris Wang – FEEDBACK
Finn’s heart raced as he pedalled through the narrow streets of Amsterdam. Suddenly, he screeched to a halt, his eyes fixed on a colourful poster announcing a citywide bicycle safety competition. He gasped. This was his once in a lifetime chance to save the environment and his parents’ struggling bicycle shop! Straight away, he headed to his parents’ shop and, using the phone, gathered his friends to form a plan.
“Together, we can beat Zurukinville and win this environmental safe-biking competition!”
Finn’s friends agreed heartily. They put on their ‘thinking caps’ and began to brainstorm ideas. Before long, they had printed several posters, sticking them around the town, and handing them out to passers-by that were willing to help. But, they needed more, more, MORE! They snuck peeks at ZUrukinville’s posters. They were bold, bright and amazing! Finn and his friends needed something better. Creative, colourful magazines zoomed around the town, and before long, everyone was offering their services to Finn and his friends. The florist made batches of biking bouquets, the grocer drew bicycles on the fruit baskets, and the restaurants drew bikes on their menus!
Finally, the day came. People gathered to see the presentations. Finn stepped forward.
“This is the future of our town. People safely riding on their bicycles, limited cars, and reduced air pollution and greenhouse gases.”
The audience watched in awe as the presentation unwrapped, and as it wrapped up, they broke into applause. This was a big success.
Finn stood in front of his parents’ bicycle shop, now a ‘learn to ride’ centre in the middle of the town. Around him, children pedalled happily, reluctantly going home when their parents arrived. It had been a big change for the community and Finn’s family and friends, changing their lives for the better.
FEEDBACK
Nancy Wang – FEEDBACK
Down the narrow street in Amsterdam. There was the world national bicycle competition. And if you won, you would get 1 thousand dollars and a huge trophy and also a world last welcome sticker. Fin thought that it could change he and his family’s, so he sign up.
One that day Fin’s heart bounced faster as he stepped on his pedal with his fastest speed that he ever used. This was the only time that he could save his family and his parents’ struggling bike shop. He used his greatest power to step the pedal.
“Go Finn!”his father screamed. Fin went very fast but from now, Fin was the last one. Suddenly a flight flew over the court and made a huge noise, then everyone was thinking where the flight would land, but Fin didn’t. He always watched front and focus.
But, when flight flew over, then the others were getting faster, but Fin finished his third round and quickly went to finish. The others drove as fast as they could, but it was too late to do that. Fin already went to the finish line.
“Woo-hoo!” yelled Finn’s father. Fin won the game, he was waiting for others to finish the competition.
“Now it’s time for giving rewards,” said the host, “our first one is Fin! Congratulations, Fin,”Then the host gave Fin a huge trophy, 1 thousand dollars and a welcome sticker, the world just had one.
After that competition, Finn’s father stuck the sticker on the door and the news of Fin winning the National Competition was spread to the entire world. And many people went to his father’s bicycle shop to buy bicycles and Fin’s family had a nicer and better life.
FEEDBACK
Yiming Kong – FEEDBACK
Finn’s heart raced as he pedalled through the narrow streets of Amsterdam. An attractive poster was stuck on the front of the lolly shop. Finn’s legs uncontrollably pedalled towards it, as his eyes beamed with enthusiasm. It read that the winner with the most sensational speech about citywide bike safety would earn 1 million dollars! He immediately saw a vision that his parent’s bicycle shop would no longer struggle.
“Dad, dad!” cried Finn.
He scurried over the rusted bike tires, battered bike pedals and handlebars, along with moldy hemelts.
Finn sacrificed his play time into researching about bike safety. He lives in an environment surrounded with bikes, the most efficient and accurate way is to ask his family.
5 days, 4 days, 3 days, 2 days and 1 day left. It was time for the thrilling moment. People from Amsterdam crowded around the stage which was extremely obvious to spot.
AN applause full of encouragement gushed towards him and gave him the determination to change their shop, life and their future. Winning or losing, we don’t get to change or choose. However, always believe in yourself and follow your dreams, you will be the real hero.
FEEDBACK
tim1107 – FEEDBACK
Finn’s heart raced as he pedalled through the narrow streets of Amsterdam. Suddenly, he screeched to a halt, his eyes fixed on a colourful poster announcing a citywide bicycle safety competition. The winner of this competition will receive a medal, a safest bike shop award (if they have one) and a brand-new BMX Rapid Bike! Finn immediately signed up since this was the chance to save his parent’s bike shop! Then, he saw a little line of words beneath the big title.
“You need to race with your bicycle after the presentation to determine the winner?” He breathed. He read the poster again.
“What?! The presentation day is in 3 weeks? I got to hurry up.” He raced back to his parent’s shop and started building a bicycle for the race and presentation. This bike was different to the other bikes since it had a special turbo to maintain speed and a detector to warn the rider. It also has an automatic balance system, when the bike is about to fall over, the bike will straighten up again. Finn locked himself in the bike shop as he worked on his bike. He painted it with shiny yellow paint as yellow was his favourite colour. After he finished it, he cycled laps around the dam 4 times every day to train for the race. His dad recorded his speed on a notebook.
Finally the day came, Finn was ready to showcase his project to the world. When it was his turn, he revealed the project and presented his bike perfectly. There were many nods and gasps as he talked. Eventually it was time for the race. Finn lined up with the other racers and Bang! The race has started! Finn pedalled with all his strength but still couldn’t catch up with the bike in 1st place, the bike in 1st place seemed to have a turbo motor engine attached to it. Finn decided to turn on his turbo, as it roared to life, Finn’s bike sped forward, immediately passing the bike in front before Finn even realised he was in 1st place. Finn’s bike crossed the finish line, and he had won! Soon, he stepped up the platform and received the prize.
After that, Finn’s parent’s shop had been turned into a bike shop/school and everyone in Amsterdam came to buy or ride bikes.
FEEDBACK
Joshua – FEEDBACK
Finn’s heart raced as he pedalled through the narrow streets of Amsterdam. With a screech of brakes, he halted, his eyes fixed on a colourful poster announcing a citywide bicycle safety competition. The winner would receive a medal, a safest bike shop award (if they have one) and a brand new BMX Rapid Bike! Finn immediately signed up since this was the chance to save his parent’s bike shop! Then, he saw a little line of words beneath the big title.
“Competitors must complete a race following their presentations to determine the winner,” he read aloud. He breathed. He read the poster again.
“Three weeks until presentation day? I’ve got to hurry!” He raced back to his parent’s shop and started building a bicycle for the race and presentation. This bike was different from the other bikes since it had a special turbo to maintain speed and a detector to warn the rider. It also had an automatic balance system, when the bike was about to fall over, the bike would straighten up again. Finn locked himself in the bike shop as he worked on his bike. He painted it with shiny yellow paint as yellow was his favourite colour. After he finished it, he cycled laps around the dam 4 times every day to train for the race. His dad recorded his speed in a notebook.
Finally the day came, Finn was ready to showcase his project to the world. Taking his turn at last, Finn unveiled his creation and delivered a flawless presentation. There were many nods and gasps as he talked. Eventually it was time for the race. Finn lined up with the other racers and Bang! The race had started! Finn pedalled with all his strength but still couldn’t catch up with the bike in 1st place, the bike in 1st place seemed to have a turbo motor engine attached to it. Finn decided to turn on his turbo, as it roared to life, Finn’s bike sped forward, immediately passing the bike in front before Finn even realised he was in 1st place. Finn’s bike crossed the finish line, and he had won! Soon, he stepped up to the platform and received the prize.
After that, Finn’s parents’ shop had been turned into a bike shop/school and everyone in Amsterdam came to buy or ride bikes.
Finn loved spending time in his parents’ bike shop. The shop was filled with the smell of perfume and the sound of wheels spinning, but lately, it felt different. Business was slow, and Finn could see the worry in his parents’ eyes. They had worked so hard, and he wanted to help save the shop.
One day, Finn heard about a big race happening at the annual Bike Festival. The winner would get a trophy and a cash prize that could really help his family. Finn’s heart raced with excitement. If he won, he could make a difference! Finn decided to train hard. He pulled out his old bike, Thunder, a bright blue mountain bike. Every afternoon after school, he rode through the trails in the woods, practicing turns and speed. He imagined winning the race and how happy it would make his parents.
Finally, the day of the Bike Festival arrived. The streets were filled with colourful banners and cheerful people. Finn felt nervous as he lined up with other racers, many of whom had shiny new bikes. But he shook off his doubts. He was ready. The horn sounded, and off they went! Finn pedalled as fast as he could, the wind rushing past him. At first, he fell behind, but he remembered his training and found his groove. He pushed himself harder with every turn, feeling the support of the crowd and his parents cheering for him. As they raced, Finn spotted the finish line in the distance, but there was one last big hill to climb. It looked tough, but he refused to give up. Just when he thought he couldn’t go on, he heard his parents shouting his name. Their encouragement gave him the boost he needed. Finn pedalled up the hill, feeling like a superhero. As he crested the top, he saw a rider in front of him suddenly have a flat tire! Finn seized the moment and zoomed past. With all his strength, he sprinted toward the finish line, his heart pounding.
He crossed the finish line first! The crowd erupted in cheers, and Finn couldn’t believe it. He had won! He rushed to his parents, who hugged him tightly, tears of joy in their eyes. The prize money was just what they needed to help the bike shop. That night, they celebrated together, filled with laughter and dreams for the future. Finn felt proud, knowing he had helped his family. With his parents by his side, he knew that they could face any adventure together.
FEEDBACK
Jayden Li – FEEDBACK
As Finn enthusiastically pedalled his bike to his home from his piano lessons, he imagined himself as an Olympian cyclist every day for hours and hours. While his dream started to fade as his mind started to drift, a poster caught Finn’s eyes. He screeched to a halt, throwing his bike to the ground and skimming through the brightly coloured advertisement. On the sheet of paper, it said that top 20 cyclists will get $648 as a reward! There will be approximately 100 people competing in this race. He realised how much it would help his parents’ bike repair shop. “I’ve got to win this race!” He thought to himself.
Just then his friend Levi walked by and asked “Hi, what are you looking at?” Finn pointed at the poster and said that he is going to participate. He also asked if Levi wanted to join so he has a training partner. Levi nodded and accepted the challenge.
Every morning, they would ride their bikes to and from the park. They had a strict training regime and they tracked the time that it took them to ride to the park. It is around the length of the eco-friendly racetrack which is where the race will be held. The racetrack is made from plants and other natural materials. Each time they ride, they get faster and by the end of the week, they are fast as a cheetah catching its prey.
As the school holidays approach, the boys’ doubled the practice time and when they competed each other in a race, an old lady was blocking the footpath. Finn avoided the elderly woman and skidded on the road to prevent injuries on the her. His legs were full of cuts and bruises. Fortunately, Levi saw the old lady and pulled the brakes on his bike just in time. He ran to the side of the road where Finn was. Levi helped him get up and they slowly headed home.
The fall last week made Finn give up on this race which resulted in feelings of discouragement. “What if we fall and get injured?” they wondered. They have been researching about cyclists in the local library. They discovered that around 95% of cyclists have gotten seriously injured or died from this activity.
“You can’t just give up from a small injury, your parents need the money to maintain their shop,” Levi said to Finn. ‘You tried so hard already so don’t let yourself down.” Finn thought about it and he decided he’d kept progressing.
On the morning on the race, the boys go for one last lap around the park and house. Levis mum times them and gives them a shocked face when she shows them the timer. 4 minutes and 32 seconds! That’s the fastest time they’ve ever done!
They also have a strategy for the race, start slowly then go as fast as you can. After going to the restaurant to top up their energy for the race, they headed for the racetrack. When they arrived, there was a big crowd in the distance. Cheers and chants echoed in the stadium. “Competitors, please come to the starting line,” the microphone announced. Levi and Finn walked slowly into the crowd, conserving energy for the big race. 3…2…1…GO!
Levi and Flynn followed the competitors with a steady speed at the start. As they kept their pace, the front bikers’ trip on a pebble and send 11 people crashing onto the ground. When there is a quarter of the race left, the pair gradually increased speed and passed the group of people. “5m left!” They pedalled at tremendous speed, making a blur when you look at them. Whoosh! They passed the finish line together with a smile on their face.
Slowly, the bike repair shop upgraded from a rusty cluttered shed to a fresh clean room. The pair learnt that it not the winning that counts but the determination and courage you put in it but winning is also quite fun!
FEEDBACK
Alessia Li- FEEDBACK
Finn’s heart raced as he pedaled through the narrow streets of Amsterdam. Suddenly, he screeched to a halt, his eyes fixed on a colorful poster announcing a citywide bicycle safety competition. Finn’s mouth and eyes opened as large as a golf ball, this is a great chance to save his parents’ bike shop he thought to himself. “What!” Jack gasped. “If you want to win the competition, you have to beat Peter, the best rider in town! The competition starts in 1 month, it’s impossible!”
Finn decided to give it a go because the winner gets 30 thousand dollars which is enough for his parents’ shop. “Ok, I respect your choice, but it’s going to be hard. You can train with my dad, he’s a couch for riding bikes.” Jack answered.
The first week was very tough, but Finn tried his best and made it to the end. Peter’s dad trained him for weeks and weeks and weeks. Finally, it’s the big day. “So, you’re the new contestant that I heard of. What’s your name?” Peter asked. “I’m Finn and you must be Peter,” Finn answered. But Peter didn’t reply, he just nodded and prepared. “On your mark, gets said, go!” The judge shouted.
Finn pedaled quickly, and his hands were sweating as he held on the handle. He past several contestants and when Finn thought he was about to win…Bump! His wheel tripped on a stick and he fell! Blood bleeding all over his leg and his arm was hurt so badly that he could hardly lift it up.
People all whispered and looked around at Finn but when they all thought he was about to give up, he stood up and got back onto his bike again then pedaled on the rocky road. “Go Finn! Go!” His mum and dad yelled.
With the cheer from his parents, Finn pedaled even faster. As the others breathed heavily and some of them stopped, Finn thought to himself, this is the chance to win. He then passed all the contestants again except Peter.
“You’ll never win me!” Peter laughed at Finn. But as Peter was laughing at Finn, Crash! Peter bumped into a tree! Finn then quickly pedaled to the finishing line. “In 3rd place, we have Ben, in 2nd place we have John, and in 1st place we have…Finn!” The judge announced. “Here’s your 30 thousand dollars, and can you tell us what you’re going to do with the money?” The judge asked. “I’m going to use it to save my parents’ workshop,” Finn answered.
FEEDBACK
Carissa – FEEDBACK
“Bye Finn! See you tomorrow!”A voice said to Finn. It’s was just a regular day after school. Finn strolled to his bike and relaxed on his bike as he pedalled through the bustling streets of Amsterdam. He gazed around to see all the people and his eyes caught a peculiar poster stuck on a wall on the other side of the street. He screeched to a stop, as he squinted at the poster. His eyes were fixed on a colourful poster announcing a citywide bicycle safety completion. His mind bursted with ideas. He could use this chance to save his parents’ struggling bike shop!
Finn burst through the door.” Mum! There’s a bicycle safety completion! We’ll create the most eco-friendly safety campaign ever!” Exclaimed Finn, bursting excitement.
The next few weeks Finn was Jammed-packed with things to do with the competition with his team, Lotte and Sami. They made flyers and convincing signs, along with meaningful chants to shout and speeches to say. Finn thought they were unstoppable. The next day Finn woke up to hear loud chanting outside his window. There were signs decorated with colourful signs, convincing people about their safety campaign.
Finn lost all hope.
“ what’s wrong Finn” asked lotte sympathetically.
“Didn’t you hear the chanting this morning?” Croaked Finn.
“Sami lay his hand on Finn’s shoulder.
“Even though they’re better than us it doesn’t mean give up. I say we don’t give up on team pedals and make ourselves ourmoured!” Shouted Sami.
Over the next few weeks, the competition loomed closer. But team pedals never gave up and their competitors were soon no better than them. They worked from sunrise to sunset and never stopped to take a break. After a few days the competition had arrived. Gasps rippled through the crowd as Finn revealed their final project. It wasn’t just a presentation, but a vision for safer, newer and more connected Amsterdam. A ginormous cheer rippled across the whole crowd as Finn knew he had done it. Win or lose, he knew that they’d made a real difference in their city- and that was the true victory.
FEEDBACK
Ian Xu – FEEDBACK